VOTE 4 Firehouse's Christmas Pickle Video

Caroling. Christmas cheer. Barfing pickle relish in your beer.

http://www.aniboom.com/competitions/Fox/393561/The-Carol-of-the-Christmas-Pickle/

Boston Massacre

I have seen the winged serpent. The copiers have run red with the carnage.

The sacred ground of the Nunnery that once stood here, is now tainted.

The floors littered with the mangled remains of Handle-Bars and Sellecks alike.

The prophecy has been realized.

Sî se puede. ¡Silverio es VICTORIOSO!

The Istache-athon embarks

It's not a matter of man-follicle-hood, it's who can do the Chuck Norris,

who can don the Selleck, who is retarded enough to embody the Sippowitz

for the longest period of time. Winner gets a 60 gig video I-pod.

Day one, appropriately Valentine's Eve.

My money is on the ravishing brute in the plaid shirt.

My body sluggish with Goat Meat

I noticed on our weekly meñu today that Thursday, we rent a Kripsona
for a trip the Greek Isles.

Soon our bodies will be brown by the sun, our bellies filled with goat meat,
our mouths glistening as we dine on Moussaka.

Methinks I hear the God Zeus chuckling from on high.

Overheard at the Cuellar Residence:

"I can't believe you're not going to make the bed."

"I can't believe you won't let me shave the dogs."

Worse than hearing Eddie Murphy's eighties sensation: "Party all the Time"

A collection of things I've heard round the boardroom table at my last
place of employment or why I tell the truth as often as Kevin Federline.



"Then through the defeathering process, you basically end up with fecal
soup." (Actualy true.)

"We want you to think of a box, within a box, and when you're concepting,
think outside of that second box."

"That layout reminds me of my mother-in-law's wash & set."

"Let's save some production dollars and do all of the CG in house."

"How am I supposed to approve this ad when I'm drunk?"

"I'd like it, if I were a Jewish Mexican."

"Can you hire this guy Kevin Roddy to do the assignment?"

"I want you to use this color scheme I found in my daughter's Tiger Beat."

Top ten uses for a USC "National Champions 2006" T-Shirt

10. Stitch 10 of them together to make a pair of undies for Kirstie Alley.

9. Donate them to the Countdown-Until-Nick-Lachey-is-Homeless Clothing Drive.

8. Ebay them with the profits going to free Maurice Clarett for wrongful imprisonment.

7. Terry Bradshaw bald spot waxing rags.

6. Wear one to Brokeback Mountain and be uber-gay.

5. Send one to Geraldo Rivera and wait for him to report it as a true story.

4. Dress small children in them if Michael Jackson is present, and pray he confuses them with Frat guys.

3. Coat one with herpes ointment, and then and only then,
will Christina Aguilera wear it.

2. Compress them into a giant bar-bell so Arnold Schwarzengger can do reps with it while calling you a girlie man.

1. Bevo XIV's training diapers.

The cabs in New York are indeed yellow.

That's right, chicken.

Sue has never been to New York, but what she could ascertain
from our short 36 hour stay, is that not one of our cabbies ever
took us to where we asked them to take us.

Broken English or not, we could make out of the 4 of 4 trips in
the belly of the yellow beast, that traffic was just too ridiculous
to fulfill our requests.

We even had to interview with the cabbies before getting in.
It might have been easier to request a business meeting with
the Donald himself.

I guess next time we go to New York, we'll have resumés in tow
just in case we need to get uptown.

I'll be sure to add a dab of Aqua Velva to the paper for nuance.